The Santa conundrum …

I have been struggling with the issue of Santa for the last few weeks. This morning, I opened my devotional and there was a small piece on St. Nick which mentioned that today is St. Nicholas Day, so I took that as a sign to mention this to you all today. So what is my Santa issue you ask? First, let me give you some background. Back in the late 70's there was a little girl who loved Santa. I mean LOVED Santa. She started lists for Santa in October. She loved Santa decorations, Santa letters, making cookies for Santa … you get the picture. But when the little girl was seven, her obnoxious older cousin took her up to her aunt's attic two days before Christmas and showed her all the presents waiting to be put out from the non-existent Santa. Ouch. It was an ugly Christmas. Yes, that little girl was me, and I think I cried all through that fateful Christmas holiday. Now, although my obsession with the mythical Santa ended badly, I still love Santa. I love the idea of magic that he brings. The magic that anything can be waiting for you on Christmas morning. I think the tradition of Santa is something innocent, fun and whimsical – traits that are frighteningly lacking in today's culture of growing kids into mini adults by the time they are five.

So that is my shtick on Santa. What is the issue you ask? Sarah (6) doesn't believe. Ahh, my heart breaks a little just typing it. The other night Sarah casually mentioned, "You know I think Santa is just some man dressed up. He isn't real." Pete was ready to say, "Yes, you're right Sarah." When I jumped in and defended the little man dressed in red - and there lies are problem. Do we just tell her there is no Santa? I know it may sound silly, but I am not ready to give up Santa. I am not ready for what that says about Sarah. I want her to be an innocent wide eyed little girl who can believe in the magic of this world. I want her to go to sleep one night a year listening for the patter of reindeer hooves. I want her to lie in her bed wondering if maybe, just maybe, she will get that special toy she has been dreaming of, and then have her wake up to it stuck in her Christmas stocking. Is it too much to ask to get just one more year of this innocence?

But the flip side of the coin is complicated for me. What is it going to take to get one more year of Santa? Well certainly it is going to take lying to Sarah. It is going to take some active amount of deception that may or may not work. I don't feel very good about that. A few months ago, I read an article in Mothering magazine about a mom who believes (literally) in wood fairies. She so desperately wanted her daughter to grow into a faith in fairies that she thought she would help her along. She had the entire neighborhood involved in creating the illusion that wood fairies were actively involved in this little girl's life. They left her notes and gifts for years. Of course the inevitable came, the neighborhood kids revealed the sceme, and the little girl was absolutely crushed. She lost faith in her mom and felt completely betrayed. As I was reading the article, I was thinking, "this women is completely mad!" Then the author compared her wood fairy obsession with other people's Santa obsession. Well that struck close to home. I don't want Sarah to feel I betrayed and lied to her, setting her up to have her friends make fun of her for believing in something that doesn't exist. I don't want my daughter to lose faith in me. Most importantly, I don't want her to start questioning the stories I teach her. Like maybe that one about the man from Nazareth who died and three days later rose again – you know they say it is just a fairy tale of desperate people.

So there is my Santa conundrum. Do I push to have Santa stay, or do I let him go? Please, please send me your suggestions. How does your family handle Santa? I need some advice today from you wise women!

An Advent for everyone…

As I have been writing my chippy little posts this week about fun ways to celebrate Advent, I have been plagued by the faces of my friends and family who are entering this holiday season with nothing less than dread. In the past few weeks I have cried with friends who have lost their jobs, marriages, pregnancies and parents. Friends whose children have cancer and parents have Alzheimer's. In my immediate circle, it has been a sad time. This season all the festivities seems just downright offensive for these friends. The twinkling lights, the carols, and the memories of past Christmases are all seemingly aimed at crushing the resolve of the broken hearted.

I know it is tempting to stick one's head under the sand and wish for January. The concept of honoring Advent, counting down to the very holiday one dreads, is inconceivable. But did you know Advent is dual purposed? Most people recognize it as a time to prepare our hearts to honor the birth of Christ. The second purpose often gets lost in the happy shiny messages of Christmas. Advent is also a time to prepare ourselves for the future coming of Christ. A time when Christ will reign over our very broken world. He will reign over death, hunger, fear, hate, cancer, depression, ______________ (go ahead, fill in the blank) For me, that is the beauty of Advent. That's the Advent that is for everyone. Each week as we add the light of one more candle on the Advent wreath, we can be reminded that His reign is coming near and will dispel the dark, broken world we live in today.

I came across the lyrics to this popular hymn yesterday. What a wonderful anthem for Advent.

O come, O come, Emmanuel
And ransom captive Israel
That mourns in lonely exile here
Until the Son of God appear
Rejoice! Rejoice! Emmanuel
Shall come to thee, O Israel.

O come, Thou Rod of Jesse, free
Thine own from Satan's tyranny
From depths of Hell Thy people save
And give them victory o'er the grave
Rejoice! Rejoice! Emmanuel
Shall come to thee, O Israel.

O come, Thou Day-Spring, come and cheer
Our spirits by Thine advent here
Disperse the gloomy clouds of night
And death's dark shadows put to flight.
Rejoice! Rejoice! Emmanuel
Shall come to thee, O Israel.

O come, Thou Key of David, come,
And open wide our heavenly home;
Make safe the way that leads on high,
And close the path to misery.
Rejoice! Rejoice! Emmanuel
Shall come to thee, O Israel.

 

Advent Reading

For the last few years we have done nightly devotion readings with the kids. We have been using the book , The 25 Days of Christmas: Family Readings and Scriptures for the Advent Season by Greg Johnson. We cuddle up together, read the story and the kids eat thier candy from thier Advent calendar. The book is aimed at children a bit older than ours, but as a family (including grandparents and great grandma as we get closer to Christmas) we have all enjoyed it.

Although we have enjoyed this book, this year we are adding a couple of new books into the mix to give them a try.

We are reading Jotham's Journey with the kids before bedtime. Jotham's Journey is an Advent storybook which follows the adventures of 10-year old-Jotham who lives in Isreal at the time of Christ's birth. Each night of Advent there is a short chapter to read in the story.



I have two new books for myself this season. One my mom gave me called The Little Blue Book. It has brief devotions for each morning of Advent combined with information about Christmas traditions around the world. My mom is using this devotion book as well this Advent, which I think is so nice for us both to be reading at the same time.

My other new book this season is really a book on tape. For the last year, my friend Joanne has been telling me about Robert Benson's The Night of The Child. Taking her suggestion, I got the book on tape to listen to by the Christmas tree. We have our tree up and (don't take this the wrong way) I am looking forward to our Thanksgiving guests leaving so I can in my family room one evening and listen to it!



Does your family have a favorite Advent season book? I would love to hear what your family is reading this Advent season.

26 days of family fun ...

I hope you had a chance to look at the Advent Conspiracy video, I linked in my last posting. I love the phrase it gives of giving less presents and more presence this Christmas. So often I think over the past week and I can't find much time when I really gave my girls my undivided presence. That is definitely one of my big goals for this Christmas season.
My friend Katie and her husband Andrew have a great Advent tradition with their two kids. Each day when the kids open their advent calendar door of the day, they don't find candy as most kids do, they find a family activity or adventure. Some of them are simple, some of them are bigger weekend adventures that Katie and Andrew have planned out. I think this is such a great way to make sure you connect with your kids every single day of the Christmas season.
I asked Katie to share some of the surprises her kids will be opening this year.

• making a fire in the fireplace
• Going sledding
• Having hot cocoa after dinner
• Taking a drive to see the neighborhood Christmas lights
• making Christmas cookies together
• watching a family Christmas movie

I loved her suggestions. At first I thought, "how can I come up with 26 things?" But after I heard Katie's ideas, and then looked at our calendar and saw special things we are doing such as going to the Parade of Lights, our church's choir concerts, and friends' Christmas parties, I saw that it would be pretty easy to fill in the rest.

Do you have special things, big and small, that you do with your kids each December? I still need to fill in a few days and would love to hear what your family does this time of year.