A few weeks ago at a church dinner, I watched my friend Wendy's daughter Greta holding three cups by the drink coolers. Our church puts out those large orange coolers full of lemonade, sweat tea and water. I saw that Wendy was busy getting meals for her two girls, so I went over to see if I could help. I asked Greta if she needed help. She said "No, I am getting the drinks for my mommy and sister." Well, you see Greta is three, so I thought I better help anyway. She was very thoughtful in her selections, taking her time to make all the right choices. Sweat tea for mommy, lemonade for her sister and herself. I helped her fill up the glasses, but she was bent on carrying them herself. She was a little girl on a mission. I told her to take two and come back for the other. By that time Wendy had come looking for Greta and I told her that what she had been up to. I have been thinking about Wendy's response for the last week. She said, "Greta, thank you for serving me!"
Thank you for serving me. What a beautiful response. It hit the nail on the head. Wendy could have said, "thank you for being my helper." Or "that was very nice Greta." But Greta wasn't just helping or being nice, she was serving and it was beautiful to watch. I don't know about you, but I want my children to grow up to have servants' hearts. I want them to grow into women of God who look around their world and serve it with the love of Christ. I want that, but all that week I was wondering what am I actually doing to cultivate it?
For starters I wasn't sure that my girls know what the word "servant" means from the Christian perspective. Second, I knew I hadn't taught them that we are called to follow Christ's example and serve with love, "For even the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve," (Mark 10:45). So those would be the first two things I needed to work on.
But the third thing is so much bigger. I need to model it. As a mostly stay at home mom, I spend much of my days serving my family. But how much of that serving is done through love? Honestly, not enough. I pack lunches, do laundry, clean toilets and tie shoes from the mindset of a worldly servant (think sad 17th century maidservant). My attitude frequently reflects my worldly servant mindset; I'm grumpy, worn, and resentful. Over a cup of coffee, I day dream of maids, laundresses and nannies who will come to my rescue. I need to wake up! What a horrible example I am setting! Is it no wonder that when I ask Sarah to set the dinner table she sighs the weariest of sighs as if she is being sent back to a coal mine?
Our whole family needs to shed our worldly servant mindsets and claim our blessed position as servants of Christ. So for the last week, I have started to change my mindset and the vocabulary that goes with it. The girls and I have been talking about having a servant's heart and how we can live that out at home. But a heart level change like that is not something we can beat into our kids or shove down their throats, its something we have to encourage and cultivate. So now when I see Sarah putting on Emily's shoes for her, I don't say, "thank you for helping Sarah." I say, "thank you for serving your sister with love Sarah." Today when I caught Emily helping Sarah clean up her Webkinz, I said, "Emily, thank you for showing the love of Jesus, by helping Sarah clean up her Webkinz." It's amazing how this seemingly small shift has made a really huge difference in our attitudes about being helpful toward one another. It has been a really neat thing to watch.
