Tonight Joanne and her family are coming over for dinner. Partially because my back is still sore and partially because it is 101 out, I was not super motivated to do a lot of cooking today. I came up with a pretty simple summer dinner menu and everything has been ready to go since about 2 this afternoon. The ease of today got me thinking to how I use to prepare for guests. There is only one word for it - scary. I don't know why, but for the first 5-7 years of Pete and I's marriage, I became completely insane when people came over for dinner. The menu was planned out in extreme. There had to be 2-3 appetizers. Some huge hunk of meat, like a lamb roast or a prime rib. Of course the meat needed 3-4 sides to go with it as well as a homemade dessert worthy of a Martha Stewart magazine cover. ( I tried today to find a picture of this pumpkin cake I used to make each October - it's pretty insane.)
Well after all that planning, and cooking and of course cleaning, I rarely had a good time. Pete and I would fight in the hours (or sometimes days) leading up to the party. I would be exhusted when people arrived and after everyone left, Pete would swear we were NEVER having guests over again. I created so much pressure on Pete and I. It was ridulous.
The sad part was, that I really enjoy having people over. Having a meal at home is so much more relaxing and enjoyable than going out. With kids now in the mix, resturants are always a sad disaster and babysitters get expensive.
Sometime in the last 2 years, I finally realized that my friends don't want to come over to my house to have a four course meal of fancy food. They want to come over and hang out. They want to let the kids run wild in the backyard while we eat stinky cheese on crusty bread. (Because what is better than stinky cheese among friends!) What a relief this realization has been. The best part has been that we actually have friends over a lot more often then before and we go over to friends houses quite frequently as well. When you set the bar at prime rib and Martha Stewart cake - who wants to try to reciprocate!
So what are we eating tonight?
Chips with mango or tomato salsa (all from the store)
Dinner: Roast chicken, green salad (Joanne's bringing that), Orzo salad, and of course a loaf of bread with some stinky cheeses.
For dessert the kids are making us ice cream in our ice cream ball and I bought a pie.
Easy, easy, and I can't wait for the Heim's to arrive.
Thursday, July 31, 2008
The scary hostess
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6 comments:
setting a perfect example of what joanne's book is all about! it all sounds so fabulous i only wished i lived around the corner from you! nothing's better than wanting to have people over and actually enjoying the prep and the time together.
what a relaxing and rewarding post. I am all about the no-stress get-togethers. Hope your back is feeling better.
Good for you. Although, I do remember well some of your fancy dinners and I must say that I was impressed! You are an amazing cook. Your fancy dinners were fabulous! (Even though I was pregnant and completely puked all over the place at one of them. --so sorry and embarrising!)
You're special! I do think, "someday when I move into my new house I'll have a big fancy dinner and use my fancy china, Like Wendy, and I be a grown up too." :-) I considered you a "grown up". But, again, thats in the land of no kids. :-)
Love ya! You're fabulous. Enjoy and go the easy route. I guess I don't need to be a "grown up", I have kids and like serving sandwiches to my friends. :-) Katy
Someone told me that "cleaning is part of the fun of being together, it's part of the meal"--let your friends help you clean, don't save all the hard work for after they leave! Love, Katy
Yay for you!
I was a scary hostess at one point too. Having children was good for me...made me realize I couldn't do everything perfectly.
When John was a pastor, we were always having people over. At the last two churches we were a part of, we set aside one night a week for guests, and I came up with two menus that I rotated. Both were super simple (they had to be...I had small kids and a baby), and I learned to shut the doors to certain rooms in my house, and focus more on enjoying my guests than being the "perfect" hostess".
I still used those two menus today when we have guests over, and there is nothing I enjoy more than spending a relaxed evening with friends in our home.
I hope you guys had a lovely evening!
Great Wendy, I am glad you are allowing your guard down. Time with you is worth way more to me than anything you could cook no matter how wonderful.
I too made that discovery this week. I was hosting people in the middle of chaos and found that BLTA's were an easy solution with cut up fruit and a simple bag of rice crackers. For dessert I used a roll of sugar cookie dough and then added oatmeal, butterscoth chips, and milk chocolate chips, they looked and tasted homemade and were very simple. I hope you enjoyed your summer evening.
Jinny
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